The Tram That Always Comes First (But Not Mine)

The Daily Pattern of Mild Annoyance

Every day, after work, I walk to the tram stop like any other tired human trying to get home. And like a perfectly rehearsed joke, I always see a tram arriving… in the wrong direction.

Not once, not twice — literally every single time.

At this point, it feels personal. Like the universe saw me coming and thought, “You know what would be funny?”

So I stand there, pretending not to care, but internally having a minor existential crisis. And as I watch the wrong tram glide away with smug confidence, I realize — this happens a lot. Actually, every time. Or at least, that’s how it feels.

Selective Memory: Our Built-In Bias

But then I start thinking (as one does when stranded at a tram stop): is it really every time? Or do I just notice it more when it’s the wrong one?

Because when the tram I want comes first, I don’t even blink. I just step in and go home. No drama. No story. No memory. But when the wrong one comes? Suddenly it’s a tragic event.

That’s when I realized — it’s not bad luck. It’s just how our brains work. We’re wired to notice what annoys us and ignore what goes smoothly.

The Negativity Bias (a.k.a. Why We’re All Dramatic)

Apparently (Thanks ChatGPT), this is called negativity bias — our evolutionary habit of remembering pain more than peace. Back when we lived in caves, it made sense. Forgetting a pleasant sunset wasn’t a problem, but forgetting which berries could kill you? Fatal.

Fast-forward a few millennia, and now the same wiring makes us remember missed trams, awkward silences, and that one embarrassing thing we said in 2018. Meanwhile, all the good stuff — the smooth commutes, the meals that didn’t burn, the friends who actually text back — just slip by unnoticed.

Invisible Goodness

Maybe that’s the saddest (and funniest) part: the good moments are too quiet. They don’t make noise. We only wake up when things go wrong.

We normalize comfort, love, and luck so quickly that they disappear into the background. It’s like our brains are addicted to small doses of chaos just to feel alive.

What the Tram Taught Me

The tram taught me something stupidly profound: life probably gives us “our tram” first way more often than we think. We just don’t notice.

We only remember the friction — the times we wait, miss, fall, or fail. But maybe the real balance of life is fairer than we think. It’s just that happiness whispers, and frustration yells.

Final Thoughts

So next time I’m standing at the station and the wrong tram shows up first, I’ll try to remember all the times the right one did — and I simply didn’t care.

Because maybe the universe isn’t mocking me. Maybe it’s just reminding me to notice when things work out, not only when they don’t.